thinking about: war

I’m not outwardly political, because being a journalist I’ve learned to keep quiet on my thoughts.

Right now, I’m watching Flags of our Fathers. My father and brother really like war movies. I do too, but sometimes I have to turn them off, especially the ones about the Vietnam War.

War has had a profound effect on my family and my life. I was born shortly after my parents reunited from a 5-year separation. my mother bore my brother alone, in the middle of a war zone. After Saigon had fallen, there was still gunfire.

I’m thinking about this war that we’re in right now. I’m 25. I grew up in a time of peace. We had a strong economy, everything was good. I was a freshman in college when 9/11 happened. It did not change everything. It was a terrible thing, and it changed many lives, but I was far removed. I had a friend who had a friend in NYC. That was it.

I have lived my life in pretty much the same way. Day to day, war has barely touched my life. I have known soldiers, but I have been lucky enough to know that they have all survived. Whether they are the same men I knew, I’m not sure. Whether they have been changed irrevocably, I do not know.

I’m thinking about my children. Some day, this era will be in the history books. The choices this nation has made will be recorded and my children will ask me what it was like. I’m almost ashamed to say that I won’t know what to say.

“I was not involved with the war sweetie. Because I was a reporter then I couldn’t really protest against it, even if I wanted to. I don’t know that anything was different for me.”

What sort of answer is that?

War kills. People have lost husbands, wives, brothers, sisters, sons and daughters. It is a big deal. A big , big deal. And my life has been the same.

What sort of answer is that?